Dear Person(s) I Care About

I want you to know I just took a forty-five-minute shower. My hair is wet, my feet are be-socked, and the lotion I put on smells like black cedar or some such. A scent named after the color of the shirt you're wearing and your favorite tree, anyway. White sequoia. Orange maple. Buffalo plaid gingko. Anyway, I bring this up because I spent three-quarters of an hour trying to think of a way to start this letter, and the best thing I came up with was, "I'm good."

As you know, I struggle with depression and anxiety. The past few years have been challenging, and there were days I refused to get out of bed. Brush my hair. Be a human. Things have changed, though. In March, I started working at Axis Architecture + Interiors, an architecture and design firm in downtown Indianapolis. My title? Marketing coordinator. My duties? Writing proposals, managing the website, and instructing co-workers on why they don't need to put two spaces after a period.* It's been a delight, and I could not have asked for a better "work family." My co-workers are patient, creative, innovative, and empathetic, and I would readily defend all of them.

Strange things happened at the office.

In addition to my full-time gig, I also freelance. (You can find my byline on 100 Resilient Cities, Indianapolis Monthly, Kit, Midwest Living, and Visit Indy, among others.) I also write for a jet boat company in Madison, Indiana. In September, they invited me on a two-day tour of the Ohio and Kentucky rivers. Definitely a highlight of 2017.

I'm on a boat! (Not pictured: Me on the boat.)

This year was also the year I started writing weird crap comedy. I took a few classes through Second City, did stand-up here and there, and dabbled in improv and sketch comedy. I have no desire to be famous, but I do participate in a monthly comedy show here in Indy. Although I still get nervous before every show, my legs no longer shake while onstage. [Insert flashback to any, or all, year(s) of high school.]

Writing was not the only thing that pulled me out of my "funk." Through it all, Ty has been my closest companion and confidante. We crossed the four-year mark in August, and for our anniversary, he gave me a "we go together like cats and more cats" card. (The man gets me.) This past year, we participated in Chicago's annual Bike the Drive event, traveled to Washington, D.C., and re-watched the first 11 seasons of The Simpsons. I have no idea what we'll do in 2018, but I will say this: Ty always makes me laugh, and is ever-selfless and loyal. He's known as "Uncle Ty" to my nephew, Max, who turned two earlier this year. The little tyke has a penchant for guitars and crayons, and I'm curious to see how his creativity expands as he ages.

It took us four years and four drinks, but we finally got a good selfie.

Anyway, I'm just as unsure on how to finish this letter as I was on how to start it. What I'm trying to say is this: I'm happy. 2017 was the year I went without a car, ran multiple half-marathons, and started using Benefiber. I also learned a few things: 1. I will cut myself if I aggressively Windex the bathroom mirror. 2. I can't pull off eucalyptus-scented lotion. (Best stick with buffalo plaid gingko.) 3. Gratitude goes a long way. I could not be where I am today – emotionally, physically, grammatically – without you. Thank you for believing in me, continuing to care for me, and loving me for who I am, and who I could be. You are one of the many reasons my heart is full, and I wish you and your loved ones the most wonderful, happiest of times. 

* Unless you're using a manual typewriter, put only one space after a period.**

** This is the hill I want to die on. 

Join the Sixth Annual Ornament Swap

Pack away those zombie, ninja, and sexy fidget spinner costumes — it's time for the sixth annual ornament swap!

For the uninitiated, the swap is an international event in which two people trade holiday ornaments through the mail. Anyone can join (my mom even participates). "Swappers" from 14 countries have participated, and you will be partnered with someone who shares your shipping preferences (domestic vs. international).

As for the ornaments themselves? They can be handmade, store-bought, vintage, crafted, nontraditional — you name it — but they shouldn't cost more than $10-$12. If you are looking for ideas on what to send your partner, check out the 2012, 2013, and 2014 ornament showcases!

TO JOIN THE SWAP:

1. Email dawn@candidlyclyde.com with the subject line ORNAMENT SWAP.

2. Include your name and postal address.

3. Include your shipping preference (international or domestic).

4. The deadline to sign up is Nov. 17! 

5. Encourage others to sign up by using the hashtag #ornamentswaparoo! 

Dear Family and Friends

I remember the year Santa left me a Lion King toy. It was 1994, I was six years old, and my brother and I were spending Christmas Eve at our dad’s. Before we went to bed, my brother gestured toward the window and said, “Did you see that? The red dot flying over? Had to be Rudolph’s nose.”

My brother—eight years my senior—knew who Santa was. But that year, he let me believe. He made sure I went to bed with an eager heart so that, when I woke, raced to the living room, and saw a three-foot-long stuffed Mufusa, I’d think magic was possible. 

Now that I’m older, I have items like dish rags and socks on my wish list. I still think magic exists, however. I am of the opinion that it is what makes wi-fi work. I also think it’s in the sparkle of winter frost, and in my 14-month-old nephew’s laughter. And I’m pretty sure it’s behind those moments when you can’t stop smiling, hugging, and thanking the heavens.

When it comes to 2016, there are a few moments I would label “magical.” Like when Ty and I traveled to Colorado, for instance. Standing atop the mountains, breathing in the crisp air? Enchanting. This also was the year I ran my first 10K, as well as two half-marathons. Running in the pouring rain—and knowing Ty was at the finish line—was exhilarating. The most heartfelt moment of 2016? Having my nephew tell me, clear as day, “Goodnight.”

That said, this year has had its challenges. We all know the election has been … the election. And, as you probably know, I’ve been fighting depression and anxiety for the last couple of years. However, I did find a therapist whom I trust, respect, and adore. She’s been helping me understand myself, accept myself, love myself. Not an easy journey. But when I’m feeling low, I’ll generally go for a walk. (And by “go for a walk,” I mean, “end up sitting cross-legged in the middle of the sidewalk, a stray cat in my lap.”)

What’s gotten me through my darkest days are the little things—a goofy animal photo from a friend, a compliment from a stranger. Lately, though, I’ve been gazing at my Christmas tree, filled with childlike content. Because even though 2016 has beaten me down at times, life is … good. Weird, but good. This is the year I performed my first stand-up routine, started eating pistachios, and stopped wearing bras.

Undergarments aside, I’m looking forward to spending time with family, friends, and Ty, who has been my better three-quarters for more than three years. And while I don’t expect Santa to make an appearance at this year’s celebrations, I fully believe there still will be laughter, surprises, and, yes, magic. And I hope, sincerely, that your Christmas is filled with it, too.

Merry Christmas,

Dawn

Fifth Annual Ornament Swap

What the what. It's November already. How. Why. When.

Anyway, all y'all know what that means: It's time for the fifth annual ornament swap!

For the uninitiated, the swap is an international event in which two people trade holiday ornaments through the mail. Anyone can join (my mom even participates)! "Swappers" from the United States, Canada, Great Britain, Ireland, Germany, Japan, Taiwan, Trinidad, Spain, Singapore, Australia, New Zealand, Italy, and Romania have all participated, and you will be partnered with someone who shares your shipping preferences (domestic vs. international).

As for the ornaments themselves? They can be handmade, store-bought, vintage, crafted, or nontraditional, but they shouldn't cost more than $10-$12. If you are looking for ideas on what to send your partner, check out the 2012, 2013, and 2014 ornament showcases! (Sorry I'm lame and never got around to making one last year.)

TO JOIN THE SWAP:

1. Email d.marie755@gmail.com with the subject line ORNAMENT SWAP.

2. Include your name and postal address.

3. Include your shipping preference (international or domestic).

4. The deadline to sign up is Nov. 15! 

5. Encourage others to sign up by using the hashtag #ornamentswaparoo! 

Periods for Pence

Let's talk about the elephant in the womb. Yesterday afternoon, I stood on the Statehouse lawn, one of thousands of voices chanting, "My body, my choice! My body, my choice! My body, my choice!" I was shoulder-to-shoulder with the daughters, mothers, grandmothers, sisters, cousins, brothers, sons, fathers, and grandfathers of Indiana. And, together, we protested HEA 1337 and rallied for women's rights. 

Because women should not have to fight for control over their own bodies with politicians. Because a woman should be able to discuss every option with her doctor. Because a mother should be able to choose what is best for her child, her family, and herself. Because the state should not force parents to take care of a child with genetic defects and not bother to provide them with resources and funding. Because doctors should not be subject to wrongful death suits. Because a woman should not be persecuted if she miscarries. Because … because a lot of things. Viva la vulva. 

Here is coverage about yesterday's rally. And here. And also here. To learn more about HEA 1337, have a look at the digest on the Indiana General Assembly's website. I also recommend browsing NUVO's social justice articles. And please read this Washington Post editorial, written by an Indianapolis obstetrician, and this story about Dr. Willie Parker, who provides, under restrictive conditions, abortions in Mississippi. Oh. And be sure to check out the Periods for Pence Facebook page, too, and call the governor's office.